Going after physical comforts, serving the self-grasping mind brings only insecurity. Why not fight with this trouble-making self-grasping mind instead? Be more contented. Be more renounced.
Through my visit to various countries, I noticed that there are many self-appointed lamas providing initiations. They do this because they don’t know how to teach, and just confer initiations by ringing bells and say “goodbye” without even giving a proper teaching on refuge. There is even the danger of their giving commitments to people to recite powerful mantras, but a person receiving such a commitment [without proper understanding and motivation] can end up having enhanced anger, attachments and other delusions which cause them to end up in the lower realms. To really learn Dharma, one has no choice but to learn lam-rim and lo-jong. Thus in daily life, the transformation of delusions can only happen by applying mind-training. If one meditates without understanding Dharma, one might gain the benefit of some relaxation but otherwise, the meditation is wasted.
The actual power of Dharma is its ability to help us subdue our minds and therefore enables us to handle samsaric life better and equip us to cope with the pressures of daily life. Since delusions are not always active in our mental continuum, it means that we have the opportunity to meditate on antidotes and we should do so. In any situation, including in family situations, there will be more harmony, less fights, less problems if we understand dependent arising, by understanding that care and respect must be mutual.
In short, try your best to gain the understanding of emptiness through the knowledge of dependent arising. Actualize bodhichitta through practicing non-harmful thoughts. Reduce anxiety, fear and insecurity in your daily life because these bring out problems and suffering in your daily life. As long as one has proper refuge, the blessings of the guru and one puts effort in understanding and applying Dharma [happiness can be gained].
I am just an ordinary woman lacking in knowledge and thus it may be impolite of me to give you advice. But whatever I have advised you here is based on my own life in building a sense of security, fearlessness, contentment and unshakeable faith in the Dharma, my gurus, karma and dependent arising. My life changed due to my little understanding of dependent arising, due to the inspiration that came from learning about dependent arising.
Seeing how difficult Khadro-la’s life was before and now, how does Khadro-la feel about life now?
I don’t cling to past experiences because life in this contaminated body will naturally have all forms of difficult experiences and changes. So I don’t dwell on the past.
Women seem to have more difficulties in practicing Dharma – temperament, jealousy, tendency to idle-talk. What advice does Khadro-la have?
In Dharma [potential], there is no difference between men and women. The nature of delusions, the nature of clear light and the antidotes to be applied are the same for men and women. In physical aspects, there are differences, but, in Dharma practice, both have the same capabilities. I would say that women are more suited to being leaders of countries because they have an innate sense of care and would more willingly embrace other countries. For the practice of bodhichitta, women have a quicker potential to actualize that because of this deep sense of caring and sacrificing for others. Whether the men support women or not, the buddhas and bodhisattvas support us! (laughter) And when the Buddha taught, he taught by referring to mother sentient beings and not father sentient beings! (more laughter). But yes, some women do have narrow thinking and cling to small issues. Better to be broad-minded and think at a higher level.
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Source: mandalamagazine.org
